I hadnt talked to bobby for a few days... until last night. I had gone to Nashua with Erin and we were takling about our relationships and I go to thinking. Its funny, this whole time I have made Bobby out to be the mean horrible boyfriend and I was the victim, when in reality I was FAR from perfect. I did some things and said some things that I shouldnt have. Suddenly I find myself overwhelmed with guilt and I am beating myself up for all that I had done.

I dropped Erin off and made my way downtown where I found him playing basketball. I pulled in and he came up to me. I told him how sorry I was and that I NEVER should have done what I did and I let him know that I regret it and that all I want is for him to be happy. HE was very nice about the whol thing. He didnt say much, just let me talk. It was good to have his attention. I feel like he truely listened and that makes me feel good. After I finished saying everything I needed to say he thanked me and we said good-bye.

I left in tears but I wasnt completely sad. i was happy that the conversation went the way it did. I was happy that I got to say everything I needed to. I still think and wonder where he is at night. I wonder if he is with Amanda. But I push those thoughts out of my head. Its not worth thinking about. I just have to let go. Live my life and if we meet up again that would be great, and if we dont well then I guess it was just meant to be that way. ..... I still miss him though.