Well, I left work late last night. I flew home, washed my hair, changed and then flew to the mall, bought Nick the pedals for his car and a card. Went to his work and put them in his car, visited with him for a little while and then went and met Erin. We were going to stop by his house and then he said that there were to many people there so we couldnt. Then I called him back and asked him if he just didnt want to see me and he said no, that wasnt it at all. I told him that I am just a little overprotective of my feelings and he said that he understood that. I told him that I just cant get hurt again, not right now and he said that he has never hurt me in the past and he doesnt plan on doing it in the future. He goes, "I've always liked you Melissa." and I went "You have?" and he said "yeah, I dont know what it is, I cant put my finger on it. I dont know theres just something about you." and I said "that sucks you in?" and he was like "yeah." and Iwas like "I know how you feel."

Then he promised that he would call me last night and he didnt. That made me sad. He has been text messageing me and saying that he is sorry and he thought he sent me a text last night but I didnt get one. Im not looking for apologies, Im looking for the truth. I just feel like he's not telling the truth. I want to believe him but something is making me doubt him...

I just asked him if he would lie to me and he said "No way in hell. i dont wan to screw things up." I wrote back and said. "Im sorry for being so paranoid, I just dont want to lose you. Im scared you will find someone better and leave me. Im waiting for him to write back right now.

He said "no dont feel like that. Remember how I told you how you make me feel." Then I wrote back and I siad "I know. I jsut love you so much you know?" And he said "I know, and I love you so much."

I am writing "you make me feel so good. everything I worte in that card was true. Did you like the card?"

I dont know what I was thinking leaving him. he treats me like a princess. I love him so much.