Well its Friday and Im happy because its the weekend but Im not happy because I know that B is going to want the kids to sleep over. I know this might sound selfish of me but I dont want them to. I want my house to myself, I want to sit on the couch and watch whatever is on for as long as I want to. I want to clean, I dont want to feel like Im barred to my bedroom. It's hard because I dont have kids, and I dont for a reason. Im 23 years old and right now, I dont want the stress of kids in ly life. I just feel suffocated when they are over. They are all over the house, Im subjected to watching wrestling and SpongeBob all weekend, they eat all my good snacks, they shower at our house, which B doesnt see a problem with b/c he doesnt do the food shopping, and he doesntclean the bathroom and he doesnt do the laundry. I just feel like after a long week at work (and this one has definately been long) all I want to do is go home and relax.

I tried to explain to him how I feel but he doesnt get it. He doesnt understand that I dont have the kind of love and connection for them that he does. I just wish he would remember that its my house too and sometimes I should be able to get what I want...

I'll write more later. Im at work right now and the privacy level is low.